


Routine

by PegaPonyPrincess



Category: Borderlands
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-01
Updated: 2015-04-09
Packaged: 2018-03-20 16:43:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3657729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PegaPonyPrincess/pseuds/PegaPonyPrincess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Athena doesn't understand what she's feeling, but she definitely doesn't like it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Athena knows how to perfectly execute scavs, psychos and anyone else with simple, extravagant movements. She knows how to mask away emotions and keep a stone cold face prominent at every moment. She knows how to disable and sneak her way around security personal.

What she  _doesn’t_  know, is that strange beating her heart does when Janey Springs is nearby. She doesn’t understand what’s happening, nor why she stutters so disgustingly over words. It’s childish and unlike herself. So she takes it upon herself to spend as little as time possible with her —  _she has a mission to do after all_ — but she soon realizes how miserably she’s failing.

Moxxi’s bar is loud and the usuals are about, laughing and drinking amongst themselves. Athena feels out of her element: sitting off to the edge of the bar, hood up and sipping quietly at her drink. She surveys the crowd once, then twice and her blue eyes lock onto  _her_.

Not only is Janey Springs there, smile and all, but so is that  _Amelia_  girl.

Amelia, who gladly gave her number to Janey a couple days ago after Athena and the other vault hunters assisted her distress call. That Janey sent them on. Janey.  _Amelia._ Together.

The ex-assassin nearly drops her bottle, a strange feeling overcoming her and suddenly she’s _fighting_  the feeling of marching right over to the two of them. Instead, she forces herself to look away, taking a long drink and placing the bottle down on the counter with a little too much pressure. A CL4P-TP gives her a certain look and she sneers briefly until her stoic face returns.

Her gut tells her to leave while she’s still ahead, before she does something she regrets. And normally —  _normally_  — she listens and complies, but there’s just that something that’s keeping her seething in the corner of Moxxi’s bar. She doesn’t comprehend what this feeling is (and more importantly, is this _natural_?), and swallows. She can still feel the CL4P-TP’s eye on her, the robot’s hue of blue static and zooming to get a better look. 

Janey’s laugh reaches her ears and she deadpans.

Athena’s moving before her brain can catch up with herself, and she’s tossing her bar stool aside. Leaving an almost generous tip, she’s moving past the blue robot and her hood’s falling down as she follows the sound of the blonde. Her insides are firing off warning signals left and right, that whatever she was about to do, is absolutely terrible, but something’s pushing her to continue.

She reaches their table in under a minute, and Athena’s brain catches up. She gulps, now realizing that she  _has_  to at least say something, as both Janey and Amelia are staring (and they’re quite confused at that). “Uh,” she starts, voice dropping and she’s wishing that she was being shot at in every angle by scavs. “… hey.”

The blonde’s smile meets her eyes and she’s replying faster than Athena would like her to. “Hey there, ‘Thena! Didn’t notice that ya came in!”

The ex-assassin glances between the two, and it’s more than clear that she’s regretting her decision. She clears her throat to speak, but falls silent and instead stares at Janey — who returns a with another look of confusion before it’s swiped away with a devilish one instead.

“ _Oh_!” she says, carefully too. “You remember, Amelia, right ‘Thena? You and the other Vault Hunters helped her out.”

Athena nods and her cold eyes draw over to the brunette, that strange feeling not faltering at all. “Yeah.”

Smiling, Amelia tilts her head and Athena holds back from gritting her teeth. “Thanks again, by the way.” Her words are a bit slurred, and the ex-assassin wonders how much she has had to drink. “Janey offered me a few drinks and I  _couldn’t_  refuse the offer.”

“…  _Springs_..?” Athena manages, hardly loud enough ti be heard over the music. Janey’s brows raise at the sound of her last name, but she smiles all the same and offers a flirtatious wink.

“Yeah, Janey did.”

Her hand reaches for Xiphos while she attempts to take a deep breath. Fingers twitching, she forces her hand to lower and makes a ghost (and very  _faint_  at that) smile towards the two of them. She’s sure that Janey’s reading her like an open book, and she feels like she needs to kill scavs  _now_  but she can’t move away. She can’t  _stand_  seeing this Amelia girl sitting there with Janey.

“Ya okay there, Athena?” the blonde asks, watching as Athena bites down on her lower lip. How she awkwardly stands at the edge of the table with a facial expression completely incomprehensible, but then again, it’s more than often she’s already presenting that face to the world. “Do you need to sit down?”

“No, I’m fine.”

Suddenly Amelia’s standing and now it comes to Athena’s attention how she’s taller than her as well. “I’ll go get her a water, she’s looking a little pale.”

“ _I’m fine_.” Athena repeats, arms folding across her chest. The brunettes gets the memo but doesn’t make a move to sit again, instead she meets Athena’s eye and remains there.

There’s a long silence, and something’s telling Athena to drop it, so she finally listens to herself. She flashes a look to Janey, who holds both a concerned and amused look. Her heart flutters, she wants to hate it, to fall back into those Atlas standards that were beaten into her being, but something’s stopping her. It’s tearing her apart, she’s feeling her insides fight one another, and there’s a stabbing feeling.

“…  _Seeyoulater,_ ” she forces out, turning very promptly on the soles on her feet and making record time to the fast travel station and choosing the first available destination; Serenity’s Waste.

* * *

Seventeen kraggons, twenty-two scavs, and three badasses later Athena finally lets out a battlecry and lowers Xiphos. It’s been two hours later and the thought of Janey laughing it up with Amelia is still fresh on her mind. She’s perplexed, angry, and most off all, haunted.

There’s a  _slight_  lack of thrill from brutally murdering everything she saw, which only driven her to charge more fiercely at the next enemy. The next kill lacks that same thrill and she’s thrusting Xiphos into a pleading scav with no remorse at all. In fear of losing her touch, she leaps, finds her next pray, raises Aspis and strikes.

Taking fire of the nearby enemies, she raises no fear and charges at them. Still searching for that thrill of making a clean cut off the nearby kraggon. It falls and she’s seething, a new anger coming to the surface as she throws Aspis at the last scav and only shakes her head as he falls. Placing Xiphos in its sheath, her blue eyes scan the horizon of Elpis before her Oz kit’s throwing warnings about her oxygen levels.

The haunting thoughts are coming back as she moves swiftly, to anywhere with oxygen and she only pauses once as she realizes that she’s making her way back to  _Janey’s_ old place. That feeling comes back briefly, and she’s still not understanding what it is. It still makes her want to fall back into old routine that she knows so well.

The only thing she  _does_  know, is that she  _doesn’t_  like Amelia spending time with Janey. 


	2. Bullet Bitting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bite it hard, and bite it fast.

Athena lingers awkwardly outside Moxxi’s bar, gnawing on her bottom lip. She’s covered head to toe in blood from various enemies she’s slain, from scavs to kraggons. Her blue eyes glance between the entrance and Janey’s place, and there’s a whispering in the back of her head. An infuriating whisper, and she cannot track why it is that way.

Venom. That’s what it feels like; poison to her veins just at the thought of the two of them being together. A constant sting — pain, that;’s eating at her.

The thought of the two of them laughing together, maybe Amelia touches Janey’s hand, crosses her mind and there’s a fire burning in her. Maybe that brunette becomes more friendly, and they’re doing something more than  _holding hands._

Grubby, maybe calloused hands that touch Janey’s skin, with eager and reckless resolve. That tear off her clothes, hungry burning in those eyes Athena never bothers to look into, eating away at the precious skin that Janey wears intentionally. Scars on a  _long_  stomach riding up to her neck and the ex-assassin dwells on whether or not her entire side is painted with marks.

Wait,  _what_?

Athena’s breath hitches and her face becomes warm suddenly. The thought transitioned from Amelia touching Janey to  _Athena_  touching her, and she’s unsure why she’s not so angry about it. It’s terrifying, because never before has such a thought crossed her mind. And never would she ever imagine finding the thought intriguing at the same time.

Lowering her eyes, she lifts her hood and leans against the wall. The longer she waits and lingers, the more thoughts that fill her mind. She’s torn between emotions she knows she’s not supposed to be feeling, and is stuck with no way to deal with them other than killing off more scavs.

At least she wasn’t hearing the sound of Janey laughing anymore.

But… something is nice about hearing that laugh. It lifts those bad feelings away for a long enough period of time that she has a clear set of mind — that she can at least process a few things without having another urge to slay someone brutally for the sake of it.

Though, unfortunately she is hearing a familiar voice. That high pitched, ‘I’m actually quite depressed!’ voice that gets old and tiring after moments, which only belongs to Claptrap. Athena grunts, looking away and only praying that he rolls by and doesn’t make an attempt at striking up a conversation. And while she hopes and hopes, she can just  _hear_  his non-existant mouth open. “Heeeeey Athena!”

Failure never feels so bad as it does now, and she’s slowly, so so slowly, looking over at him with a low glare. “Hello, Claptrap.”

“What are you doing?” He asks, and it’s clear that he’s wearing a grin despite one not actually being there. “Waiting for a  _hot date_?”

Athena scrunches her nose at the thought: her? On a date? She can’t help the snicker that eases through her lips and finds her shaking her head. “That’s ridiculous. I’m clearing my mind before we head off.”

His eye zooms in, scanning her a few times and his claws shut slowly.

Her lie is so noticeable, but maybe he’s being generous enough to let it by. Then again, she realizes that this is  _Claptrap_  she’s speaking to and  _nothing_  is  _never_  that easy with him. So before he can even get out another word Athena pushes herself away from Moxxi’s bar and speaks once. “See you.”

Athena knows he wants to follow, like a puppy that wants to be fed. But he’s already learned once before (and she was  _not_  nice about brutally stabbing him and letting him respawn), and decides against the idea. So, she smiles and finds herself entering Janey’s place.

She turns, looks at the grinder and wonders if she can stop herself while she’s ahead. But as her ear’s are picking up a certain voice she’s gotten to know too well, she’s moving towards the door and ignores knocking. She knows she’s unheard, from years and years of training, and simply stares and finds Janey by herself.

Suddenly she’s pleased, and there’s this unnamable feeling in her stomach. A part of her wants to leave then and there, because a weight’s been lifted off her shoulders. However, she clears her throat and Janey’s turning fast.

“Amel—” If Athena thought Janey smile was wide, it grew with intensity upon finding her standing in the doorway. “ _Oh!_  Athena! Didn’t know ya were going to come by!”

Panicking, Athena stumbles for words. “Uh,” she manages. “It’s a last minute decision?”

There’s a knowing look in the blonde’s eyes, something that Athena can’t read. Her stomach flips and her skin crawls with uncertainty as Janey walks closer to her. A hesitant step backwards is taken, and she watches the blonde pout only briefly. “I thought ya were Amelia there for a moment. She did say she was stopping by soon.”

There’s that anger again. Burning inside her so intensely that she grips Xiphos tightly. “I haven’t seen her.” Athena says, and she’s  _almost_  surprised by the fact she didn’t stutter through her sentence. “You’re expecting her?”

Perhaps her voice cracks with emotion, because Janey’s brows raise briefly, and there’s a smile on those lips and Athena feels her heart skip a beat. She’s in trouble, deep deep trouble, and she suddenly realizes now that there’s no escape. She doesn’t hear what the blonde says, because she’s too busy wondering if Janey’s lips are as soft as they seem.

Pieces are piling together quickly, and there’s a shock that overrides Athena’s body. Janey notices this, and tries to grab the woman’s attention, which only fails and the ex-assassin is stepping back until she hits the wall. Never has she been trained for this; there’s nothing in her perfect memory that states what to do. Emotions are a no go: a  _weakness_.

“Athena?” Janey tries, finally grasping the woman’s attention. “Are ya all right? ‘Sides, what’s with all that blood?”

“Scavs, lots of scavs.”

“Uh—”

Before she can even realize what she’s saying, or doing, Athena steps closer. So close that if she really wanted to, she could have Janey’s breath on her neck (and the thought right there riles her up), and she speaks in a whisper. “I don’t trust her.”

 Janey opens her mouth to speak, but Athena’s moving quickly, from both embarrassment and anger. Soon finding herself back at that trusty fast travel station where the other Vault Hunters await and no one dares to make a comment on her rosy cheeks. Besides Claptrap, who promptly gets pushed off the edge.

* * *

Athena finds Amelia near Moxxi’s bar the next day, wearing a smug look that the ex-assassin wants to rip off in a heart beat. Because as she watches, lingering in the shadow with careful eyes, there goes the brunette with Janey, shoulders brushing and laughs prominent. Her skin boils with anger and she tastes blood from her lip.

She doesn’t understand how this girl can so easily just walk her way in, taking Janey away from _her_  without thinking of the consequences. How Amelia thinks there’s nothing wrong with mesing with what Athena wants as her own. And the ex-assassin thinks of many ways she can form a clean, flawless execution on her, multiple times even ( _if_  she’s registered in the New-U Station).

But her thoughts are all drawn into one  _final_  realization: she’s claiming something that’s not hers. And she’s  _jealous_  over something. That strange feeling that’s been clogging her up earns a name finally (she can thank Nisha later, who, annoyingly enough, went on and on about Jack and this girl). She’s not liking seeing Springs acting so friendly, and it’s driving her more crazy at the sight of them being so close.

The bullet’s ready to be bitten, and Athena knows that.

And as Amelia leans closer, resting a hand on Janey on a space that fires red flags throughout her system, she bites the bullet hard and fast. She attacks her pray, with such ease — or so she wishes, because once she’s standing behind them, with a terribly forced smile, she realizes how awful she is with words. And emotions.

It only takes  _one_  loud step for both Amelia and Janey to hear, turn around, and gasp at how close Athena actually is. It soon crosses her mind how borderline  _creepy_  she’s being, how she might as well be seen as a thief or something worse. But she bites another bullet, clears her throat, and manages a single word.

“ _Janey_.”

And that’s enough right there for the blonde to grin ear to ear, with a expression with such happiness that Athena swears she just found the vault.


	3. Electric Pulse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Simple touches and smiles go a long way for Athena.

Janey’s smile is more inviting than ever, and Athena feels herself drawn in. There’s a way that her eyes sparkle just at the sound of her name and how her features convey something the ex-assassin can’t put a finger on. If Amelia wasn’t there, staring her down like a hawk (wasn’t that  _her_  job?), perhaps she’d smile back as fondly.

Instead, however, she draws her gaze to the woman who finally takes a step away and brows are raised with confusion.

Athena’s not one for this. Emotions are her weakness and she  _knows_  Janey’s aware of that, and maybe Amelia is too. Perhaps that right there will lead her to her downfall, where Amelia can steal away Janey so easily and she’ll be stuck stuttering over simple words  _like her name._

“Yes, Athena?” Janey asks finally, and the Vault Hunter can only wonder if she momentarily took her breath away. Despite this terribly awkward situation, she’s still all smiles.

Her eyes are stabbing at Amelia, as words feel like a blunt edge. And while she takes dangerous steps forward, the brunette steps back. A fear lingers around her, Athena finds this tasteful, and resists the urge to bite.

Xiphos isn’t reached for, nor does she even think of raising Aspis. Instead she wears her stoic face, knuckles white from nerves, and recalls interrogations from her past.

It’s clear that Amelia fears something, as she’s glancing between Athena and Janey with a pleading look. “Hey uh,  _Janey_ , can you help me out here?”

The brunette’s against the wall, eyes wide with something Athena can’t decipher. She goes to take a step forward, to prove  _something_ , there’s a hand on her shoulder and her whole body freezes.

Janey’s hand. With such a gentle, but yet sturdy grip that her mind’s running in circles and stomach’s dropping. “Athena, what’s wrong?”

Blue meets brown; jealousy meets curiosity.

“I told you,” Athena says, unable to keep eye contact any longer. Blue find the scared brunette, and they take detail. A scar rests above her cheek, and she wonders how that even got there in the first place. Then she has to wonder if Janey likes scars herself. “I don’t trust her.”

“ _Excuse me_?” Amelia finally barks, giving a  _very_  dangerous shove to the Vault Hunter who stumbles back briefly in shock. “What did you just say?”

Athena flares her nostrils. Anger is boiling in her veins, but something feels so  _wrong_  about starting a fight in front of Janey. Like it’d just be shoving her in the opposite direction that she intends to be in. She doesn’t dare look back, she can’t bring it upon herself to look at the blonde’s face.

Knuckles become whiter. “I believe that you heard me just fine.”

Athena hears her name coming from behind her, but she choses just this one time to ignore. She lets out an uneven breath, an uncertain anger brewing as Amelia’s taking a step towards her. Refusing to move, they’re both giving the stink eye.

“I don’t get what your problem is, Vault Hunter.” Amelia finally says, towering over her. “First you’re in our grill at Moxxi’s place the other day, and  _now_  you’re interrupting our  _date_?”

“ _Amelia!_ ”

Athena turns, faster than she probably should, and stares at Janey. Something shatters, so intensely that she forgets to breathe for a moment and she feels that her head’s spinning. She watches a certain panic flush over the blonde, and before the other can get out a word she’s moving fast fast  _fast_.

Her finger selects the first available destination and she’s off. Angry, confused and hurt.

* * *

She learns to hate this, to hate emotions more and more as she ends many scav’s lives with a simple movement. And as she stares endlessly into the abyss, with a lost purpose, she frowns and Xiphos is put back into its sheath. Janey’s fresh on her mind, so fresh that she’s still recalling that hurt expression and now she’s wondering if running off was the wrong idea.

It’s too late now, and the nauseating thought of the two of them on a date makes her want to be sicker than ever.

She sits and sighs, taking in the view of Pandora. Athena wonders when she’ll be done with this mission,  _when_  she can get back to Pandora, and  _when_  she can forget about this whole Janey thing. But then again she wonders if she can ever be so close to the blonde like Amelia was.

Being torn between wanting to go back to find Janey and killing more scavs, she fails to hear someone approaching her. Only when there’s someone sitting next to her does she realize that a) she’s not alone and b) she’s not being resurrected  yet. She inhales and finds a smiling blonde next to her.

“ _J_ –…” Athena tries, falling short with a certain confusion.

Janey’s still all smiles and there’s that strange fluttering feeling in her stomach again. “Hiya, ‘Thena. Sorry ‘bout back there, Amelia wasn’t being too friendly.”

Athena snorts and shakes her head. “Whatever,” she says, giving a wave of her hand and gazes ahead. She fears if she stares too long it’ll become problematic. “So uh,  _date_?”

“Oh that? Pff, I wouldn’t call that a real date.” Janey’s laugh is charming, and Athena has to force herself to breathe properly. “More like friends just hanging out.”

“That’s not what she thinks,” Athena draws out, biting down on her lower lip. “And uhm, it didn’t seem that way to me either.”

Janey raises a brow: she doesn’t need to look over to see that. “Does it matter to you whether it’s a date or not?”

“Yes.”

Blue eyes find a smile that’s too big for words. A ghost of her own finds its way on her lips and she’s making herself to look away. Janey has her figured out to a T, and something deep down inside, through layers and layers, likes that.

“We’ve almost found the vault,” Athena pauses, making herself breathe. “I believe you owe me a drink.”

Janey’s eyes sparkle with something special. “You’re holding me to that, Miss. Athena?”

The gladiator stands, taking in Janey for a brief moment before she’s beginning to walk away. However, she pauses, finds that she should say something and rests a hand on her shoulder. There’s a certain electricity that runs through her, something exciting, and she almost forgets to speak. “Yes, I am.”

Janey’s smile is wide, and for the first time in a long,  _long_ , time, Athena’s own matches it.


End file.
